Child Protection, how can I help? Hello?… Hello?
Is there anyone on the line?… Hell-oh?
Silence. The voice sunk down and
left you –
alone.
Shaking. Sniffing
your own helplessness, your
own fear of tomorrow. No hope.
Unless someone hears your voiceless
screaming,
your rage, your
motionless kicking. Unless
someone finds you in the corner of
your existence – barefoot, chin tucked into knees,
waiting
for your father to
return from work, to grab you
by the hair, to pull, push, breathe
the same air you do. Breathe into your neck
when
lying in bed, eyes open, legs
spread, his body leaves traces all over you,
all over your thirteen-year old mind, (mind the
corner of the bedside table). Leaving you in despair, then
Moving on
With his own things
to do – watch telly, eat dinner,
fuck your mum. I see you. I am you, only
twenty years older, still there, in the corner, knowing
Nothing
but to hate. To wait
for things to pass. To give
way to those that seem stronger. To
keep things in the locker, keep a secret. Unless
we go back there, hand in hand, and change
the past. Unless you make that call, raise
your voice and speak up. For you.
For me. For all the girls.
Hello?
Nataliya Deleva 